The Sun Will Shine Again

”We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed.” II Corinthians 4:8,9

Today was a typical St. John’s rain-drizzle-and-fog day. For the most part, this year has been atypical…we have had some nice sunny days to enjoy. But, today was a day that represented how I felt. Since Mom passed away, I have been walking around somewhat shell-shocked. How could I go from hanging out and shopping with my mother just a few short weeks ago, to now? No more text messages. No more phone calls. No more Tim Hortons runs.

Today was another day of preparation and planning for her homegoing service. I caught myself over and over today desperately wanting to call her for advice…for her own service! She was my go-to with any question, any complaint, any victory, any joy. At times today I felt like what it looked like outside of my window — bleak.

It was also the first day in a while that I have started to experience increasing physical pain. Over three months ago, the pain from an ovarian cyst (the approximate size of a grapefruit) began to disrupt my life. I have gone through a series of tests that just keep dragging on…still waiting on results. But today, I hit a wall. The pain was unbearable, the tasks at hand were overwhelming, and my heart was hurting. I felt like I was beginning to be crushed. Then the verse in II Corinthians came to my mind. I am hard-pressed on every side, but I am not crushed. Regardless of what I feel and the circumstances that I see all around me, I rest in the knowledge that Jesus is still with me in the hardest trials of this life. I dedicated my life to Him many years ago, and all I need to do is trust Him to be my Protector and Defender in the direst storms I may face. I could picture myself today clinging to the mast in a boat that was being tossed and turned by the fiercest of waves. The wind was raging and the rain was beating upon me. But as I clung to that mast in my mind’s eye, I could sense the peace in knowing that Jesus was about to walk across those waves and calm the raging sea.

I know that I am going to have days like this. And that’s okay. Because I know that the sun will shine again.